礼尚往来

Origin and story

The Quli I chapter of the Liji states that proper conduct values reciprocal exchange. Giving without a response and receiving without giving back are both presented as departures from ritual propriety. The surrounding discussion links courtesy with social stability and the habit of honoring others, including people of modest standing.

The expression therefore concerns mutual acknowledgment, not merely matching the price of gifts. Visits, hospitality, greetings, and assistance can all take part in this exchange. Later speakers sometimes use it ironically for answering hostility in kind, but its ordinary courteous sense is that a kindness should be met with a considerate response.